When I was applying for a new state medical license a while back, there was a page in the application where it asked me what horrible things I had done. Have you ever had criminal charges filed against you? Have you ever been the subject of disciplinary action? Have you ever had your medical license suspended or revoked?
Being the good girl I am, I just checked NO all the way down the line.
A few weeks later, I got notified that I was in big big trouble because I should have checked YES to one of those questions: Have you ever taken a leave of absence? Oops. I did, in fact, take a maternity leave. I then had a bunch of new paperwork to fill out explaining my leave of absence, as well as a letter from my former residency program director, also explaining my leave of absence. And of course, none of the faxes would go through.
I've actually been waiting forever to take a leave of absence. A real one, not the exhausting blur that was my maternity leave. First I planned to take a year off between second and third year of med school. Then between med school and internship. Then for sure, I was going to take a year off after residency to spend time with my daughter. Well, that didn't quite work out, although I did take a month off. Two months would have been ideal, but my fellowship director was pushing me to start.
I've realized that it's actually not so easy to take time off once you become a doctor. You gain skills during training and work, and then when you take time off, you lose those skills. Especially when it comes to procedures. Even after maternity leave, I felt a bit rusty.
Also, don't tell anyone, but I kind of like to work. Makes me feel productive.
The medical boards recognize that taking time off is a big deal. You have to account for every second of your life from when you started your MD training. When I was recently getting credentialed at a new hospital, I was physically unable to submit my online application because I wasn't able to "account for" the six weeks between my med school graduation and starting internship. I guess vacation wasn't a legitimate excuse.
At this point, I don't see any extended vacations in my immediate future. I guess I'm OK with that. I mean, look how much I blog when I'm working full time... can you imagine if I were home all day? Still, it's a little depressing to think that the next time I'll have a long vacation might be when I retire.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Friday, April 30, 2010
MiM Mailbag: Having kids during 4th year before ortho residency?
I am a 1st yr medical student who is interested in Orthopedic surgery. My husband and I were talking about when the best time to have a baby during medical school/residency is. I am military so my residency will be in an Army facility. Based on your experiences, would having a child during 4th year be feasible?
Thanks for your opinions
T
Thanks for your opinions
T
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Coming Home...
I have mixed emotions about CME courses that take me away from home. Although I enjoy time in a new location and having a break from my typical daily grind, sometimes the toll of being away from family is high, and coming home can be an adventure:
"Mom, while you were gone I forgot to register for my AP exam. What should I do?"
Late fee (after countless calls to coordinator): $50.00
Me, sniffing around the kitchen: "What is that smell?"
Finding two dozen chocolate cupcakes in the dining room "Just because we thought you'd like them": PRICELESS
"Mom, while you were gone I forgot to register for my AP exam. What should I do?"Late fee (after countless calls to coordinator): $50.00
"Mom, before you left, I forgot to tell you I needed a costume for that thing at school"
Improvised costume (NOT Eeyore!): $25.00
Me, sniffing around the kitchen: "What is that smell?""Erg, I think I forgot to unpack the milk container from my lunch box last week."
(Husband, shrugging apologetically: "I thought the kids needed showers...")
New milk container and lunch box: $15.00
Finding two dozen chocolate cupcakes in the dining room "Just because we thought you'd like them": PRICELESS
(Cleaning chocolate frosting off of everything for the next 10 days: another post!)
How do you cope with the things that come up while you're gone?
A
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Things That I Say Every Day (Home Edition)**
Although the dialogue is less technical, the day to day grind finds me saying many of the same things to my wonderful family. Here are a few of my most well-worn phrases....what are yours?
1. Good morning, sunshines!
2. I love you.
3. No.
4. What do you say?
5. Hmmmmm?
6. Put your clothes in the hamper.
7. Stop teasing your brother.
8. Stop torturing your sister.
9. Sorry, you cannot have mac and cheese for breakfast.
10. Sooooo, whatcha want to do for dinner tonight?
11. Thank you for (doing laundry, the dishes, going shopping) honey!
12. Are you ready for a bath time? A bath time party? This is old CindyLou (and Bean) ready to get that bath time started....
13. So, tell me about what you learned today...
14. I need some snuggles (or, the abbreviated, "snugs")!
15. I missed you today.
16. Did you set the DVR?
17. No, no, it is (CindyLou's/Bean's) turn to sit in the front of the tub.
18. Pick out the book you want to read tonight.
19. What was your very favorite part of today?
20. Good night, sleep tight, sweet dreams...see you in the morning.
21. Ahhhh, adult time!
22. We need to go to bed earlier.
23. I am going to bed early tomorrow.
24. I love this show!
25. Maybe we can work out....tomorrow.
1. Good morning, sunshines!
2. I love you.
3. No.
4. What do you say?
5. Hmmmmm?
6. Put your clothes in the hamper.
7. Stop teasing your brother.
8. Stop torturing your sister.
9. Sorry, you cannot have mac and cheese for breakfast.
10. Sooooo, whatcha want to do for dinner tonight?
11. Thank you for (doing laundry, the dishes, going shopping) honey!
12. Are you ready for a bath time? A bath time party? This is old CindyLou (and Bean) ready to get that bath time started....
13. So, tell me about what you learned today...
14. I need some snuggles (or, the abbreviated, "snugs")!
15. I missed you today.
16. Did you set the DVR?
17. No, no, it is (CindyLou's/Bean's) turn to sit in the front of the tub.
18. Pick out the book you want to read tonight.
19. What was your very favorite part of today?
20. Good night, sleep tight, sweet dreams...see you in the morning.
21. Ahhhh, adult time!
22. We need to go to bed earlier.
23. I am going to bed early tomorrow.
24. I love this show!
25. Maybe we can work out....tomorrow.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Things That I Say Almost Every Day (Work Edition)**
One thing that I love about my job is that it is ever-changing, and there are no two days that are exactly the same. That being said, I have my own daily script that I find myself reciting as I move through the more routine parts of my days in the office and on labor and delivery. My nurse could probably come up with a million more things (since she gets to listen to my spiel 30+ times a day), but these were the first off of the top of my head:
1. That's normal.
2. You're going to feel a little pressure.
3. Are you feeling any pressure?
4. Do you have any questions?
5. In a normal cycle, you have a rise of estrogen, then ovulation, then a rise of progesterone. If you don't become pregnant, then your progesterone level will fall and *then* you will have a period.
6. That's normal.
7. Take a deep breath.
8. Now, wiggle your toes.
9. No one will know your breasts better than you.
10. Tell me about what has been bothering you.
11. Is that interfering in your daily life? How?
12. The definition of menopause is no periods for one year.
13. It takes two 16 oz packages of cottage cheese to equal the Calcium in one 8 oz glass of milk.
14. You can do this.
15. Congratulations!
16. There are risks, benefits, side effects, and alternatives...
17. I'm sorry for your loss.
18. That can be normal.
19. I know it is counter intuitive to "relax" but try to make your muscles as loose as possible.
20. Do you understand?
21. Tell me what you know about birth control, then tell me what you would like to know.
22. That is a normal physiologic change of pregnancy.
23. I promise that you won't be pregnant forever (usually after discussing our elective induction policy of no earlier than 41 weeks gestation.)
24. How can I help you today?
25. I know this is scary, but I am going to talk you through it.
**Cross-posted at Ob/Gyn Kenobi**
1. That's normal.
2. You're going to feel a little pressure.
3. Are you feeling any pressure?
4. Do you have any questions?
5. In a normal cycle, you have a rise of estrogen, then ovulation, then a rise of progesterone. If you don't become pregnant, then your progesterone level will fall and *then* you will have a period.
6. That's normal.
7. Take a deep breath.
8. Now, wiggle your toes.
9. No one will know your breasts better than you.
10. Tell me about what has been bothering you.
11. Is that interfering in your daily life? How?
12. The definition of menopause is no periods for one year.
13. It takes two 16 oz packages of cottage cheese to equal the Calcium in one 8 oz glass of milk.
14. You can do this.
15. Congratulations!
16. There are risks, benefits, side effects, and alternatives...
17. I'm sorry for your loss.
18. That can be normal.
19. I know it is counter intuitive to "relax" but try to make your muscles as loose as possible.
20. Do you understand?
21. Tell me what you know about birth control, then tell me what you would like to know.
22. That is a normal physiologic change of pregnancy.
23. I promise that you won't be pregnant forever (usually after discussing our elective induction policy of no earlier than 41 weeks gestation.)
24. How can I help you today?
25. I know this is scary, but I am going to talk you through it.
**Cross-posted at Ob/Gyn Kenobi**
Monday, April 26, 2010
Your alternative career
RH+'s last post got me thinking about choice of specialty.
I am pretty happy with my choice of PM&R as a specialty. Right now, I'd say I'm about 90% happy with that choice. But.... about 10% of me kind of wishes I had become a neurologist.
I took neurology as a rotation before PM&R and I really loved it. It was one of the few rotations where I didn't mind putting in ridiculously long hours. I won't get into all the things I liked about it, but suffice to say, a lot of people tell me I should have become a neurologist. I think it's because I'm a HUGE NERD. Why I didn't become a neurologist is a long story, but like I said, I'm 90% happy with my decision as of now. But if I weren't a physiatrist, I would definitely want to be a neurologist.
So your challenge is to complete the following sentence:
If I wasn't a ____________, I would probably be a ___________.
Feel free to complete the sentence even if neither of the blanks can be filled with a medical specialty. (Example: "If I wasn't a lawyer, I would probably be a zookeeper.") And feel free to explain your answer. What you are NOT allowed to do is say something like, "I love being a urologist so much that I can't imagine doing anything else, and if the field didn't exist I'd just have to throw myself off a bridge!" I mean, yes, you could say it, but I'll secretly think you're full of it.
I am pretty happy with my choice of PM&R as a specialty. Right now, I'd say I'm about 90% happy with that choice. But.... about 10% of me kind of wishes I had become a neurologist.
I took neurology as a rotation before PM&R and I really loved it. It was one of the few rotations where I didn't mind putting in ridiculously long hours. I won't get into all the things I liked about it, but suffice to say, a lot of people tell me I should have become a neurologist. I think it's because I'm a HUGE NERD. Why I didn't become a neurologist is a long story, but like I said, I'm 90% happy with my decision as of now. But if I weren't a physiatrist, I would definitely want to be a neurologist.
So your challenge is to complete the following sentence:
If I wasn't a ____________, I would probably be a ___________.
Feel free to complete the sentence even if neither of the blanks can be filled with a medical specialty. (Example: "If I wasn't a lawyer, I would probably be a zookeeper.") And feel free to explain your answer. What you are NOT allowed to do is say something like, "I love being a urologist so much that I can't imagine doing anything else, and if the field didn't exist I'd just have to throw myself off a bridge!" I mean, yes, you could say it, but I'll secretly think you're full of it.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Why I became an OB/GYN
More than anything in life I wanted to be a family practitioner. Going into medical school there was little doubt in my mind that this was my chosen path. I chose a school that had a significant focus on primary care and was president of the Family Practice Club my second year. I had shadowed several FPs and truly enjoyed the continuity of care that went into FP.
When I started my rotations as a third year student, I was obviously excited to do FP as my first. After about 3 weeks, though, I wasn’t ready yet to admit it to anyone else, I was starting to have doubts. The practitioner I was working with was great he really took a lot of time to teach me and I saw some interesting pathology, but it wasn’t quite what I thought it would be. I told myself I had just built it up too much. I was a little concerned, but knew I had a few (our school required 6 months of FP) more months to try it out.
The next month, I did an away rotation in internal medicine with a wise internist who had been in practice for 30 years. While I didn’t love internal medicine, I did love the internist I worked with. I soaked up every bit of wisdom about life and medicine he sent my way. He really tried to teach me to THINK and not just memorize facts. On my last day of the rotation he sat me down and said essentially that I had done well on the rotation, but he really thought my personality was the most suited for OB/GYN.
My first thought was utter disgust… What a sexist! I was sure he was just saying that because I was a woman. OB was becoming a female dominated field, but the last thing I could possibly be interested in was doing PAP smears all day. Yuck. And child bearing had no interest to me whatsoever. WAY too messy.
I composed my initial thoughts and replied, with a simple No thanks!
When’s your OB/GYN rotation he asked?
The last one of the year I replied. I had postponed it to very last.
You should seriously consider moving it up to earlier, he encouraged me.
I thanked him for his advice as a courtesy. Then thanked him profusely for the other things he had taught me.
On the drive home I was still fuming about his remark. However, my thoughts began to wander. His wife and all 3 of his daughters were doctors…. none OB/GYNS. There were no other sexist things he had said or done the whole month. I respected him greatly and had trusted all the other advice he had given me. Perhaps, I should listen and at least move my rotation up to earlier in the year.
After several frantic phone calls trying to set up a rotation, the best I could manage was a local private practice doctor, in desperate need of some CME’s who agreed to let me rotate in his office. I ‘did’ very little during this month, but what I observed was life changing. I watched his daily practice, his rapport with his patients and the continuity of care. He was able to practice preventative medicine in a real way (one of my passions) and also do very interesting surgery. I watched babies born then same day I watched him remove a giant ovary full of teeth and hair. On my last day of the month as I drove home and I broke down into tears. I couldn’t believe my month was over… I didn’t want it to end …. Ever. I feel in love with the crazy life of being an OB/GYN.
Then began the soul searching. How could I have a family and balance in my life and be an OB/GYN? I loved my month of OB, but as I looked at the hours that the attending put in, I wasn’t sure I could hack it. After months of pro’s and con’s lists and long discussions with my husband, I finally decided to go for it. I would rather do something I loved for 50 hours a week then something that bored me to tears for 10 hours a week. After my required 6 months of FP…. I knew it wasn’t for me. OB was my Edward and anything else would just be my Jacob.
This life is NOT easy. The hours do get crazy. My husband and family are a constant in my life to help me my life balanced… that and a great practice. Also, I believe it was Dr Whoo who has said that you should only do OB/GYN if you nothing else will make you happy. I totally agree, this life is not for everyone.
So here I am, 5 years into private practice quickly approaching my 35th birthday reflecting on how my life is nothing that I expected it to be when I began this crazy adventure in medicine. I realize now, that it is amazingly better.
So, thank you Dr. Internal Medicine for your excellent advice and seeing something in me that I hadn’t seen in myself.
When I started my rotations as a third year student, I was obviously excited to do FP as my first. After about 3 weeks, though, I wasn’t ready yet to admit it to anyone else, I was starting to have doubts. The practitioner I was working with was great he really took a lot of time to teach me and I saw some interesting pathology, but it wasn’t quite what I thought it would be. I told myself I had just built it up too much. I was a little concerned, but knew I had a few (our school required 6 months of FP) more months to try it out.
The next month, I did an away rotation in internal medicine with a wise internist who had been in practice for 30 years. While I didn’t love internal medicine, I did love the internist I worked with. I soaked up every bit of wisdom about life and medicine he sent my way. He really tried to teach me to THINK and not just memorize facts. On my last day of the rotation he sat me down and said essentially that I had done well on the rotation, but he really thought my personality was the most suited for OB/GYN.
My first thought was utter disgust… What a sexist! I was sure he was just saying that because I was a woman. OB was becoming a female dominated field, but the last thing I could possibly be interested in was doing PAP smears all day. Yuck. And child bearing had no interest to me whatsoever. WAY too messy.
I composed my initial thoughts and replied, with a simple No thanks!
When’s your OB/GYN rotation he asked?
The last one of the year I replied. I had postponed it to very last.
You should seriously consider moving it up to earlier, he encouraged me.
I thanked him for his advice as a courtesy. Then thanked him profusely for the other things he had taught me.
On the drive home I was still fuming about his remark. However, my thoughts began to wander. His wife and all 3 of his daughters were doctors…. none OB/GYNS. There were no other sexist things he had said or done the whole month. I respected him greatly and had trusted all the other advice he had given me. Perhaps, I should listen and at least move my rotation up to earlier in the year.
After several frantic phone calls trying to set up a rotation, the best I could manage was a local private practice doctor, in desperate need of some CME’s who agreed to let me rotate in his office. I ‘did’ very little during this month, but what I observed was life changing. I watched his daily practice, his rapport with his patients and the continuity of care. He was able to practice preventative medicine in a real way (one of my passions) and also do very interesting surgery. I watched babies born then same day I watched him remove a giant ovary full of teeth and hair. On my last day of the month as I drove home and I broke down into tears. I couldn’t believe my month was over… I didn’t want it to end …. Ever. I feel in love with the crazy life of being an OB/GYN.
Then began the soul searching. How could I have a family and balance in my life and be an OB/GYN? I loved my month of OB, but as I looked at the hours that the attending put in, I wasn’t sure I could hack it. After months of pro’s and con’s lists and long discussions with my husband, I finally decided to go for it. I would rather do something I loved for 50 hours a week then something that bored me to tears for 10 hours a week. After my required 6 months of FP…. I knew it wasn’t for me. OB was my Edward and anything else would just be my Jacob.
This life is NOT easy. The hours do get crazy. My husband and family are a constant in my life to help me my life balanced… that and a great practice. Also, I believe it was Dr Whoo who has said that you should only do OB/GYN if you nothing else will make you happy. I totally agree, this life is not for everyone.
So here I am, 5 years into private practice quickly approaching my 35th birthday reflecting on how my life is nothing that I expected it to be when I began this crazy adventure in medicine. I realize now, that it is amazingly better.
So, thank you Dr. Internal Medicine for your excellent advice and seeing something in me that I hadn’t seen in myself.
Friday, April 23, 2010
MiM Mailbag: Feeling like an outsider applying to med school
Dear Mothers in Medicine,
I found your blog about three days ago and it is just what I needed. It is like I placed a special order with the blog gods. Thank you all for your humor, insight, and honesty.
What brought me to the site originally was MomTFH's guest post about med school with kids. What I read spoke right to me.
I am a single mother of a beautiful, charming, sweet 15-month-old daughter and I would really like to start med school in the fall of 2011. Last year I applied to the one med school in my state, but just as MomTFH said, I entered the application process woefully unprepared and blew my application because of stupid stuff (and attended my interview 38 weeks pregnant which certainly made me stick out like a sore thumb).
Now I'm ready to get serious about applying for the fall of 2011, but I'm still woefully uninformed. I have good undergrad grades (3.96 GPA), good MCAT scores (35Q), a strong research background with a research-based MS from the University of Michigan, and I ran varsity track & CC in college, but I've never been part of the pre-med world and I have no idea what I should do or know to be prepared. At the time of my interview I felt like such an outsider and I still feel like an outsider. What do I need to do to be in the know? I volunteer weekly at a Children's Hospital, but what else should I be doing to prepare myself to apply and for any interviews that may come my way? (I do work though, so I don't have TONS of time at my disposal).
Also, sorry to trouble you, but I have a second question: I may not be able to fully grasp the depths of difficulty that come with attending medical school and doing a residency with a child, but I can certainly imagine. (Luckily if I am able to get in and go, I will probably have a lot of help from my family.) I also understand that there is a lot about being a doctor today that is no picnic. I think it is only sensible to do this if I am fairly certain that I will be passionate about medicine and being a doctor. Can you make some suggestions as to what I could do to get a good idea about that?
Thank you so much for your time!
D
I found your blog about three days ago and it is just what I needed. It is like I placed a special order with the blog gods. Thank you all for your humor, insight, and honesty.
What brought me to the site originally was MomTFH's guest post about med school with kids. What I read spoke right to me.
I am a single mother of a beautiful, charming, sweet 15-month-old daughter and I would really like to start med school in the fall of 2011. Last year I applied to the one med school in my state, but just as MomTFH said, I entered the application process woefully unprepared and blew my application because of stupid stuff (and attended my interview 38 weeks pregnant which certainly made me stick out like a sore thumb).
Now I'm ready to get serious about applying for the fall of 2011, but I'm still woefully uninformed. I have good undergrad grades (3.96 GPA), good MCAT scores (35Q), a strong research background with a research-based MS from the University of Michigan, and I ran varsity track & CC in college, but I've never been part of the pre-med world and I have no idea what I should do or know to be prepared. At the time of my interview I felt like such an outsider and I still feel like an outsider. What do I need to do to be in the know? I volunteer weekly at a Children's Hospital, but what else should I be doing to prepare myself to apply and for any interviews that may come my way? (I do work though, so I don't have TONS of time at my disposal).
Also, sorry to trouble you, but I have a second question: I may not be able to fully grasp the depths of difficulty that come with attending medical school and doing a residency with a child, but I can certainly imagine. (Luckily if I am able to get in and go, I will probably have a lot of help from my family.) I also understand that there is a lot about being a doctor today that is no picnic. I think it is only sensible to do this if I am fairly certain that I will be passionate about medicine and being a doctor. Can you make some suggestions as to what I could do to get a good idea about that?
Thank you so much for your time!
D
Thursday, April 22, 2010
The little things that kill
Recently, I overheard someone at work saying she went on Zoloft, an antidepressant. "Little things don't bother me anymore," she said. "Something will happen and I'll know that it's something that USED TO bother me, but it just doesn't anymore."
I was jealous. I'm not on Zoloft and I'm definitely guilty of letting little things bother me. I let myself get incredibly aggravated over details in my contract at work. (I definitely get way too aggravated over work stuff.) I worry my vacation won't get approved. I overanalyze every little interaction I have with everyone.
My latest "little" aggravation is over my apartment, where our lease is up at the end of the summer. Instead of accepting the highest rent increase in the building (and a landlady who won't fix things because "it wasn't broken when you moved in, so how could it be broken now?"), we've opted to move. Our landlady, who took a huge loss when the housing bubble burst, has recruited every housing broker in town to rent out our apartment at a monthly rate so high that it might never get leased.
As a result, I've been getting daily calls from sometimes multiple brokers, asking to show my apartment later that afternoon. It's hard to accept that there will be strangers coming into my apartment every day, usually with not more than a few hours notice, and I admit it bothers me. What's more aggravating is the emails from my landlady, criticizing me for having dirty pots in the kitchen, saying that because I am such a slob, the apartment will never get rented.*
My husband tells me to let it roll off my back, that I shouldn't let these things bother me. He's not bothered, after all. And he's right--it's SO unimportant. But I can't help it.
I'm trying to deal with these aggravations with exercise. I've been walking home every day, weather permitting, and trying to do exercise videos with Melly at night. It helps a little bit, but I still find myself obsessing more than I should.
How do you deal with the "little" stresses in your life?
*Note: Sorry, I probably went on and on about the apartment thing for way too long, but I am just SO ANGRY over the whole thing and I needed to vent. If you want to call my landlady a bad name, that would totally help me out.
I was jealous. I'm not on Zoloft and I'm definitely guilty of letting little things bother me. I let myself get incredibly aggravated over details in my contract at work. (I definitely get way too aggravated over work stuff.) I worry my vacation won't get approved. I overanalyze every little interaction I have with everyone.
My latest "little" aggravation is over my apartment, where our lease is up at the end of the summer. Instead of accepting the highest rent increase in the building (and a landlady who won't fix things because "it wasn't broken when you moved in, so how could it be broken now?"), we've opted to move. Our landlady, who took a huge loss when the housing bubble burst, has recruited every housing broker in town to rent out our apartment at a monthly rate so high that it might never get leased.
As a result, I've been getting daily calls from sometimes multiple brokers, asking to show my apartment later that afternoon. It's hard to accept that there will be strangers coming into my apartment every day, usually with not more than a few hours notice, and I admit it bothers me. What's more aggravating is the emails from my landlady, criticizing me for having dirty pots in the kitchen, saying that because I am such a slob, the apartment will never get rented.*
My husband tells me to let it roll off my back, that I shouldn't let these things bother me. He's not bothered, after all. And he's right--it's SO unimportant. But I can't help it.
I'm trying to deal with these aggravations with exercise. I've been walking home every day, weather permitting, and trying to do exercise videos with Melly at night. It helps a little bit, but I still find myself obsessing more than I should.
How do you deal with the "little" stresses in your life?
*Note: Sorry, I probably went on and on about the apartment thing for way too long, but I am just SO ANGRY over the whole thing and I needed to vent. If you want to call my landlady a bad name, that would totally help me out.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Guest Post: Call night hijinks
An email from the husband of a resident on-call that caused serious laughter by said resident at the nursing station at 1 am.
Hi Babe,
Here are your call night pics. Kind of a rough night here. I came home to find that [Cat 1] had puked all over our comforter so that's in the wash. I was in the bathroom with R and he was playing in the cabinet...busy and pulling things out so I thought I could take a quick pee. Right as I finished, he quickly turned towards the toilet and as I was zipping my fly and reaching down for him he darted to the toilet bowl and put both his hands directly into my fresh pee (gross) so I grabbed him before he could put his hands anywhere and washed his hands for like 5 minutes in the sink.
R was really tired from the time we got home so I started to feed him dinner, which he fussed the whole way through but still ate a decent amount. Then came bath time...so we're about 75% through the bath and there's a knock at the front door. Baby boy was sitting down playing and very busy with the ducks so I made a quick run for the door and it was the next door neighbor wanting to talk about the easement again. I said "Sorry dude, gotta run - my son is in the bath and I can't leave him unattended, come back tomorrow" and basically shut the door in his face. I ran back into the bathtub to find R standing up, holding his business and peeing into the bath. I guess he just wanted to be like Dad since he just saw me about an hour before that urinating into the toilet. End of bath time...I grabbed him out of the bath before the pee circulated through the water and drained the tub.
Bottle time and he was pretty fussy through the entire bottle but still being a little sweetheart but he was just really tired! He just now fell asleep after about 30-45 min of yelling and moaning. I walk from his room to go put the comforter into the dryer and [Cat 2] has peed in front of the litter box. There was litter literally all over the laundry room. 20 minutes to clean that mess up.
I hope you're having a good call night because these 3 dudes totally wore me out! I'm going to be hitting bed early tonight!
I love you and we miss you, looking forward to having you home tomorrow and the good news is that you have Saturday off!!!
Your tired Husband (And Baby boy of course)
Monday, April 19, 2010
MiM Mailbag: Medical school, with a disability
Hi, MiM!
I'd like to start by saying that your blog inspires me each and every time there is a new post or I just can have a moment to pop in and read the archives! Way to go, ladies! Now, I'm Erin, a pre-medical student from Georgia. My case is a little special.
I'm a music therapy major with a pre-medicine advising track. For many reasons, but the main one is the fact that math and science are just not my thing. Having mild spastic cerebral palsy, I didn't know what was possible or if that was even something I should consider due to physical issues.
Then I realized. It's not about me; yes, I'm the one that has to complete the coursework and get the MD behind my name, but the patients that I serve are so much more important than whether or not I think I'm academically capable. I'm not saying that your GPA isn't important because I know that it's one of the biggest things that med schools consider during the admissions process, but it's more important to me to treat my patients with the highest quality of care possible, keeping in mind that though the human body is fascinating, the fact that I'm making sutures in an abdomen isn't "cool"; though unintentionally, i am inflicting pain upon this patient, and why would I think it was "cool" to see the reason for someone's suffering to unfold? I guess that just comes with having twenty years of clinical experience "from the other side of the table" and unfortunately, for nine of those times in the last twenty years, the surgical patient was me.
Currently, my medical school interest in terms of specialty is physical medicine and rehabilitation, so Fizzy's articles are some of my favorites. I'm toying with the idea of taking a fellowship in peds and then adding on a fellowship in developmental peds so that I have the opportunity to be the doctor I wish I had when I was younger, and besides that, they're just cute.
So, while this may be going out on a bit of a limb, my questions are these:
How do you think is the best way to approach a disability in front of the medical school staff?
Which parts of the process, based on what you all know, will be difficult for me?
How should I "keep my head high" despite obstacles I face?
Oh, and I'm a blogger as well. Feel free to check it out at the link below. Look forward to more of your tweets and blogs!
Thanks, ladies!
Erin
http://www.empowerpeoplechangelives.com
I'd like to start by saying that your blog inspires me each and every time there is a new post or I just can have a moment to pop in and read the archives! Way to go, ladies! Now, I'm Erin, a pre-medical student from Georgia. My case is a little special.
I'm a music therapy major with a pre-medicine advising track. For many reasons, but the main one is the fact that math and science are just not my thing. Having mild spastic cerebral palsy, I didn't know what was possible or if that was even something I should consider due to physical issues.
Then I realized. It's not about me; yes, I'm the one that has to complete the coursework and get the MD behind my name, but the patients that I serve are so much more important than whether or not I think I'm academically capable. I'm not saying that your GPA isn't important because I know that it's one of the biggest things that med schools consider during the admissions process, but it's more important to me to treat my patients with the highest quality of care possible, keeping in mind that though the human body is fascinating, the fact that I'm making sutures in an abdomen isn't "cool"; though unintentionally, i am inflicting pain upon this patient, and why would I think it was "cool" to see the reason for someone's suffering to unfold? I guess that just comes with having twenty years of clinical experience "from the other side of the table" and unfortunately, for nine of those times in the last twenty years, the surgical patient was me.
Currently, my medical school interest in terms of specialty is physical medicine and rehabilitation, so Fizzy's articles are some of my favorites. I'm toying with the idea of taking a fellowship in peds and then adding on a fellowship in developmental peds so that I have the opportunity to be the doctor I wish I had when I was younger, and besides that, they're just cute.
So, while this may be going out on a bit of a limb, my questions are these:
How do you think is the best way to approach a disability in front of the medical school staff?
Which parts of the process, based on what you all know, will be difficult for me?
How should I "keep my head high" despite obstacles I face?
Oh, and I'm a blogger as well. Feel free to check it out at the link below. Look forward to more of your tweets and blogs!
Thanks, ladies!
Erin
http://www.empowerpeoplechangelives.com
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Lessons learned on the wrong side of the stethoscope
I was walking down the hall at work on a very ordinary day in December. I had sudden onset of excruciating right shoulder, neck, and upper arm pain. For the first time in my life, the "...if 10 is the worst pain you can imagine" finally had meaning. It took my breath and brought me to tears. I took the Tylox I had been given after childbirth (two years ago) with little relief. By the following evening, I was markedly weak in my (dominant) right arm abduction and external rotation. I couldn't even lift a fork to my mouth righthanded without using my left hand to prop up my right elbow. The next 48 hrs were a whirlwind: emails, calls, and pages to my internist (I am usually a once a year-ish whether I need it or not patient), a possible diagnosis of multiple sclerosis, MRIs of my brain, spinal cord, shoulder, appts with ortho, neuro, and ultimately neuromuscular, including the test that provided a diagnosis: an EMG/NCS. The diagnosis was something rare called Parsonage-Turner Syndrome. I had never heard of it before (which is a very bad feeling as a doctor).
So, what have I learned from this experience of being on the wrong side of the stethoscope? A lot that I am still struggling to put into words and a lot worth sharing.
First, no matter how exciting a case is, how rare, how great a learning opportunity for you, etc, you MUST NOT say this or show your glee in front of the patient. I know such excitement can be hard to contain as a newbie medical student or doctor. I, in fact, have a very experienced internist who nonetheless said "Isn't this cool?" to me during my annual appt on multiple occasions once the diagnosis had been established. As a doctor, I know what she meant. I do recall my days in general internal medicine, when I thought I might fall over dead before the end of clinic if I had to fiddle with the dose of one more antihypertensive. I KNOW what it's like to need a good case to spice up the day. I KNOW this was an awesome medical mystery with a rare diagnosis and ultimately a good long-term prognosis. What could be better, right? But the bottom line is that I am still markedly weak, now 4 months later. I still can't pour milk for my kids from a gallon jug, hold my 2 yr old in my right arm, or lift my work bag right-handed out of the passenger seat when I get out of the car. If I were, for example, an orthopedic surgeon, my career would be over or at least on hold for probably a year or more. It has been life-changing for me, and not in a good way. So, yeah, it's cool for the doctor. Yeah, it's a great case to present (and yeah, I agreed to suffer the indignity of being presented as a case in a conference I used to attend showcasing rare diagnoses at my former residency program, at the hospital where I am still on faculty). But, as the patient, it was decidedly NOT cool. I cringe to think about all the times I presented patients on rounds or in conferences with what I'm sure was obvious excitement over this "great case". Patients, please forgive me.
Second, a little kindness goes a long way when you're in a medical crisis. When I had my first C-spine MRI without contrast, it had motion artifact but was read as potentially consistent with demyelination. As I lay there alone on the MRI table having my repeat C-spine MRI and brain MRI with contrast to look for MS and other badness on a Thursday afternoon, I had a lot of time to worry and grieve for the normal life that seemed to be receding into the past very quickly. When the tech, whom I knew could spot an MS plaque or a met on those MRIs as well as any radiology resident, came in afterwards, I begged her to tell me if she had seen anything bad. She told me that she wasn't authorized to give me any information and that I should be able to get the report in a day or so. I knew that, of course, as a doctor. But, as a patient, I couldn't bear another moment of waiting. My eyes welled up with tears as I went to leave. She hesitated a moment, then put a hand on my shoulder, looked right in my eyes, and said, "Dr. Tempeh, you have a WONDERFUL weekend." It was her code to tell me that things looked ok to her eye. I remember it as one of the greatest acts of kindness I have ever experienced.
Third, it is a really worthwhile and eye-opening question to ask a patient how a medical condition is impacting her life. The first and only doctor to ask me that to date (and I saw several along the way) was actually the neuromuscular specialist. I think that question got him the most accurate picture of the extent of the neurological impairment--I told him that I could no longer use a pitcher of water to rinse my kids' hair in the tub because I was too weak to lift it, that I had quit blowdrying my hair because I could no longer do it right-handed and it turned out weird if I did it left-handed, and that I had quit leading a certain conference because I couldn't hold my right arm above shoulder height for more than a minute or two to write on the dry-erase board. It didn't take him long to ask or for me to answer, but it felt much more "real" than his assessment of my strength through a standard neuro exam, even though the neuro exam ultimately showed the same. I didn't realize how frustrated I felt by these losses until I had a chance to reflect on them and share them with a doctor who showed an interest. And the sharing was therapeutic for me in and of itself.
Finally, validate your patients. As an internal medicine resident, I was never good at taking care of the patients with fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome. I had always been taught that the best way to approach these patients is to validate their symptoms--telling them "I know that you are in real pain," etc. I couldn't ever do that, or not very well anyway. In my heart, I wasn't even sure these were real diseases. I have to tell you that although I have never been eager to hear my name and the word "disability" in the same sentence and that I still hope never to take advantage of the disability policy I have been paying for since residency (which you should get by the way), it was a relief when the neuromuscular specialist said after examining me and doing my EMG/NCS, "You have a real disability. This is something called Parsonage Turner Syndrome." It all happened so quickly, the development of weakness literally over the course of hours, to the extent that I struggled to wash my own face and dress myself. For days as the diagnostic workup went on, I vacillated wildly between being convinced that I had something devastating--a demyelinating disorder, brain metastases, something--and that I, a previously healthy person, had for some reason actually gone crazy. Just hearing from someone in a position of medical authority that I was not crazy--that this was real and had a name even--inspired my total gratitude. I wish I could go back and have a do-over now with all of those patients. I could have done so much better for them.
Humility is hard-won.
So, what have I learned from this experience of being on the wrong side of the stethoscope? A lot that I am still struggling to put into words and a lot worth sharing.
First, no matter how exciting a case is, how rare, how great a learning opportunity for you, etc, you MUST NOT say this or show your glee in front of the patient. I know such excitement can be hard to contain as a newbie medical student or doctor. I, in fact, have a very experienced internist who nonetheless said "Isn't this cool?" to me during my annual appt on multiple occasions once the diagnosis had been established. As a doctor, I know what she meant. I do recall my days in general internal medicine, when I thought I might fall over dead before the end of clinic if I had to fiddle with the dose of one more antihypertensive. I KNOW what it's like to need a good case to spice up the day. I KNOW this was an awesome medical mystery with a rare diagnosis and ultimately a good long-term prognosis. What could be better, right? But the bottom line is that I am still markedly weak, now 4 months later. I still can't pour milk for my kids from a gallon jug, hold my 2 yr old in my right arm, or lift my work bag right-handed out of the passenger seat when I get out of the car. If I were, for example, an orthopedic surgeon, my career would be over or at least on hold for probably a year or more. It has been life-changing for me, and not in a good way. So, yeah, it's cool for the doctor. Yeah, it's a great case to present (and yeah, I agreed to suffer the indignity of being presented as a case in a conference I used to attend showcasing rare diagnoses at my former residency program, at the hospital where I am still on faculty). But, as the patient, it was decidedly NOT cool. I cringe to think about all the times I presented patients on rounds or in conferences with what I'm sure was obvious excitement over this "great case". Patients, please forgive me.
Second, a little kindness goes a long way when you're in a medical crisis. When I had my first C-spine MRI without contrast, it had motion artifact but was read as potentially consistent with demyelination. As I lay there alone on the MRI table having my repeat C-spine MRI and brain MRI with contrast to look for MS and other badness on a Thursday afternoon, I had a lot of time to worry and grieve for the normal life that seemed to be receding into the past very quickly. When the tech, whom I knew could spot an MS plaque or a met on those MRIs as well as any radiology resident, came in afterwards, I begged her to tell me if she had seen anything bad. She told me that she wasn't authorized to give me any information and that I should be able to get the report in a day or so. I knew that, of course, as a doctor. But, as a patient, I couldn't bear another moment of waiting. My eyes welled up with tears as I went to leave. She hesitated a moment, then put a hand on my shoulder, looked right in my eyes, and said, "Dr. Tempeh, you have a WONDERFUL weekend." It was her code to tell me that things looked ok to her eye. I remember it as one of the greatest acts of kindness I have ever experienced.
Third, it is a really worthwhile and eye-opening question to ask a patient how a medical condition is impacting her life. The first and only doctor to ask me that to date (and I saw several along the way) was actually the neuromuscular specialist. I think that question got him the most accurate picture of the extent of the neurological impairment--I told him that I could no longer use a pitcher of water to rinse my kids' hair in the tub because I was too weak to lift it, that I had quit blowdrying my hair because I could no longer do it right-handed and it turned out weird if I did it left-handed, and that I had quit leading a certain conference because I couldn't hold my right arm above shoulder height for more than a minute or two to write on the dry-erase board. It didn't take him long to ask or for me to answer, but it felt much more "real" than his assessment of my strength through a standard neuro exam, even though the neuro exam ultimately showed the same. I didn't realize how frustrated I felt by these losses until I had a chance to reflect on them and share them with a doctor who showed an interest. And the sharing was therapeutic for me in and of itself.
Finally, validate your patients. As an internal medicine resident, I was never good at taking care of the patients with fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome. I had always been taught that the best way to approach these patients is to validate their symptoms--telling them "I know that you are in real pain," etc. I couldn't ever do that, or not very well anyway. In my heart, I wasn't even sure these were real diseases. I have to tell you that although I have never been eager to hear my name and the word "disability" in the same sentence and that I still hope never to take advantage of the disability policy I have been paying for since residency (which you should get by the way), it was a relief when the neuromuscular specialist said after examining me and doing my EMG/NCS, "You have a real disability. This is something called Parsonage Turner Syndrome." It all happened so quickly, the development of weakness literally over the course of hours, to the extent that I struggled to wash my own face and dress myself. For days as the diagnostic workup went on, I vacillated wildly between being convinced that I had something devastating--a demyelinating disorder, brain metastases, something--and that I, a previously healthy person, had for some reason actually gone crazy. Just hearing from someone in a position of medical authority that I was not crazy--that this was real and had a name even--inspired my total gratitude. I wish I could go back and have a do-over now with all of those patients. I could have done so much better for them.
Humility is hard-won.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Who would have thought a volcano would erupt?
I'm stuck in Frankfurt...alone. I planned it all so well. I was attending a conference this week in Luxembourg, planned to be away for four nights from my three kids. My parents are helping, nanny is helping etc. I was supposed to get back on Friday and my husband was to leave for a meeting in Houston - essentially passing the baton....I don't travel much so needless to say I spent a lot of time making detailed plans for the kids - sleepover at grandparents home, rides to activities etc....after all that planning and a deep wish for my travel not to become a burden on anyone, I am now stuck for what looks like three more nights!! I guess you can plan all you want but who would have thought a volcano would erupt?
I was supposed to fly out of Luxembourg this morning but when I realized my flight was not going to leave, I took a train to Frankfurt and re-booked for a flight out tomorrow morning. As soon as I got here, I was told that the Frankfurt airport is also closed and that I would likely not be able to get out before Monday....Monday!!!
The worst part is that I have spent the last 24hours in panic-mode unable to relax. I finally went for dinner in my hotel and took a Real Simple Magazine, trying to relax...I'm so used to multi-tasking it was a really hard day to just be in the moment. I kept thinking I should open my netbook and finish checking email, or work on some of my work projects or send emails from the conference contacts.
Finally, it occured to me that I needed to do what I do best. Make a To-Do list for my weekend away. And finally I started to realize that this weekend is an opportunity to indulge in some 'me' time. I made a list of all that I would do if someone gave me a weekend off...
Now I'll do what I always do and spend the next two days checking things off that list! What's on my list? Well - it definitely includes shopping, pampering and some blogging as well :)
I was supposed to fly out of Luxembourg this morning but when I realized my flight was not going to leave, I took a train to Frankfurt and re-booked for a flight out tomorrow morning. As soon as I got here, I was told that the Frankfurt airport is also closed and that I would likely not be able to get out before Monday....Monday!!!
The worst part is that I have spent the last 24hours in panic-mode unable to relax. I finally went for dinner in my hotel and took a Real Simple Magazine, trying to relax...I'm so used to multi-tasking it was a really hard day to just be in the moment. I kept thinking I should open my netbook and finish checking email, or work on some of my work projects or send emails from the conference contacts.
Finally, it occured to me that I needed to do what I do best. Make a To-Do list for my weekend away. And finally I started to realize that this weekend is an opportunity to indulge in some 'me' time. I made a list of all that I would do if someone gave me a weekend off...
Now I'll do what I always do and spend the next two days checking things off that list! What's on my list? Well - it definitely includes shopping, pampering and some blogging as well :)
Guest Post: Second-guessing career choices
As of today, I am one month from adding those long sought-after and hard-earned initials to my name, M.D.. I matched at my number one choice in a very competitive “lifestyle specialty,” have a fabulous husband who has helped me through the emotional turmoil that is medical school, and two young boys who make me laugh and smile every day. I sit here, where I worked so hard to get, wondering if I made the right decisions.
My grandfather died from CML when I was 6, the years prior to his death being spent meeting his medical needs. My experience of the impact of illness upon a family drew me toward medicine and at the age of 6 I embarked upon the road to becoming a physician. While I could not understand this at 6, I suspect now, that I yearned for some power over illness and becoming a doctor seemed to meet this need.
In high school I decided upon pediatrics. I continued to follow this path, volunteering with pediatric oncology programs and the like. One summer during college I returned to my hometown and happened to find my way into a women’s health clinic where I served as an intern, counseling women on abortion procedures and birth control. I loved every minute of it and was eager to learn more so that I could help my patients. I got involved in activism in a way I hadn’t before. From the day I started, I knew that Ob/Gyn was my calling.
Halfway through my third year of medical school, however, I stood in the OR, 33 weeks pregnant, having held a bladder blade for who knows how long, thinking I just couldn’t do this anymore. My ob/gyn rotation, the 6 weeks I had expected to confirm my career choice, left me wanting. I hated the OR, I really didn’t want to be like the residents I was working with, I wanted to see my family, and I didn’t want to worry about the malpractice. The 3 past weeks I had spent on the gyn service had been 3 of the most trying of my education to that point. The next week I moved on to the OB portion of my rotation and absolutely loved it. I loved following patients through prenatal care and delivery. I loved the raw emotion and I never thought of it as work. I was thrilled to be able to be part of my patient’s lives in such a real way. Maybe I could do this after all.
My son was born at 37 weeks and after having a placental abruption, I was scared to death of ever being the doctor in charge of a delivery like my own. I lumped together my loathing of operative gynecology with my new-found fear of the sudden twists a routine low-risk pregnancy can take and decided against ob/gyn. This, despite my love of prenatal care, primary care, and procedures. This despite the relative ease I had with the material, my true interest and passion in the field. My decision was final, I didn’t think I had what it took to be an ob/gyn. I set about finding another specialty and over the next year and a half (I took 5 years for medical school) flipped-flopped between fields. My husband calls my decision making process the Hamlet approach, one which I do not suggest to other medical students choosing a specialty. In the end, after much drama and many second guesses of myself, I landed a spot in Dermatology. In the end, it was a well thought out, rational decision. I was thrilled with my match for all the reasons I told myself I should be. Dermatology offers a great combination of surgery and medicine, plenty of small, what I like to call non-scary surgeries, great pay, weekends to spend with my family, and the list goes on.
One week after my match, my second son was born. Within a few days, I immediately felt that my decision to go into dermatology was the wrong one. I felt an immense sadness knowing that I may never be involved in birth in such a personal way. I cannot be sure what part of this to attribute to the fact that I may not have any more children myself and what to attribute to my second thoughts about my career choice. I know teenagers can get emotional about acne and that skin cancer is a very real and serious problem, but I have a hard time getting emotional about accutane and imiquimod, in the way I get emotional about abortion and pregnancy. I have begun to look at the medical journals that arrive in the mailbox in a completely different way. While I want to read the articles on preterm birth, I feel I must force myself to concentrate on the newest treatments for lice and scabies.
So it is that I sit here, wondering which would have been the more perfect decision, ob/gyn or dermatology. Perhaps that is my problem, that I believe there was a perfect solution. To be honest, my family came first in my decision to pursue dermatology over ob/gyn. My husband has been a saint throughout my medical education, finding ways to occupy himself as I set about marathon study sessions most every weekend, taking on more than his fair share of childcare duties, and making numerous sacrifices in terms of his career, so that I may follow my dream of becoming a doctor. I made the decision to become a dermatologist, in part to allow us to have a life with a bit more balance, where he will eventually be able to follow his own career goals. But as I reflect upon my decision, I wonder if it was actually to his benefit and to that of my children. Would I have been happier doing something where I did not have to convince myself that my work was important? If I felt like I was making more of a difference with my work and truly loving it, would I be a better mother and role-model? Or would the continuous strain on my family and relationship with my husband have outweighed this benefit?
For those who have lived through this decision, what are your thoughts? If you had it to do over again, would you? Have any of you switched specialties after your initial match? How have your spouses and children dealt with the continuous demands of your career in medicine?
My grandfather died from CML when I was 6, the years prior to his death being spent meeting his medical needs. My experience of the impact of illness upon a family drew me toward medicine and at the age of 6 I embarked upon the road to becoming a physician. While I could not understand this at 6, I suspect now, that I yearned for some power over illness and becoming a doctor seemed to meet this need.
In high school I decided upon pediatrics. I continued to follow this path, volunteering with pediatric oncology programs and the like. One summer during college I returned to my hometown and happened to find my way into a women’s health clinic where I served as an intern, counseling women on abortion procedures and birth control. I loved every minute of it and was eager to learn more so that I could help my patients. I got involved in activism in a way I hadn’t before. From the day I started, I knew that Ob/Gyn was my calling.
Halfway through my third year of medical school, however, I stood in the OR, 33 weeks pregnant, having held a bladder blade for who knows how long, thinking I just couldn’t do this anymore. My ob/gyn rotation, the 6 weeks I had expected to confirm my career choice, left me wanting. I hated the OR, I really didn’t want to be like the residents I was working with, I wanted to see my family, and I didn’t want to worry about the malpractice. The 3 past weeks I had spent on the gyn service had been 3 of the most trying of my education to that point. The next week I moved on to the OB portion of my rotation and absolutely loved it. I loved following patients through prenatal care and delivery. I loved the raw emotion and I never thought of it as work. I was thrilled to be able to be part of my patient’s lives in such a real way. Maybe I could do this after all.
My son was born at 37 weeks and after having a placental abruption, I was scared to death of ever being the doctor in charge of a delivery like my own. I lumped together my loathing of operative gynecology with my new-found fear of the sudden twists a routine low-risk pregnancy can take and decided against ob/gyn. This, despite my love of prenatal care, primary care, and procedures. This despite the relative ease I had with the material, my true interest and passion in the field. My decision was final, I didn’t think I had what it took to be an ob/gyn. I set about finding another specialty and over the next year and a half (I took 5 years for medical school) flipped-flopped between fields. My husband calls my decision making process the Hamlet approach, one which I do not suggest to other medical students choosing a specialty. In the end, after much drama and many second guesses of myself, I landed a spot in Dermatology. In the end, it was a well thought out, rational decision. I was thrilled with my match for all the reasons I told myself I should be. Dermatology offers a great combination of surgery and medicine, plenty of small, what I like to call non-scary surgeries, great pay, weekends to spend with my family, and the list goes on.
One week after my match, my second son was born. Within a few days, I immediately felt that my decision to go into dermatology was the wrong one. I felt an immense sadness knowing that I may never be involved in birth in such a personal way. I cannot be sure what part of this to attribute to the fact that I may not have any more children myself and what to attribute to my second thoughts about my career choice. I know teenagers can get emotional about acne and that skin cancer is a very real and serious problem, but I have a hard time getting emotional about accutane and imiquimod, in the way I get emotional about abortion and pregnancy. I have begun to look at the medical journals that arrive in the mailbox in a completely different way. While I want to read the articles on preterm birth, I feel I must force myself to concentrate on the newest treatments for lice and scabies.
So it is that I sit here, wondering which would have been the more perfect decision, ob/gyn or dermatology. Perhaps that is my problem, that I believe there was a perfect solution. To be honest, my family came first in my decision to pursue dermatology over ob/gyn. My husband has been a saint throughout my medical education, finding ways to occupy himself as I set about marathon study sessions most every weekend, taking on more than his fair share of childcare duties, and making numerous sacrifices in terms of his career, so that I may follow my dream of becoming a doctor. I made the decision to become a dermatologist, in part to allow us to have a life with a bit more balance, where he will eventually be able to follow his own career goals. But as I reflect upon my decision, I wonder if it was actually to his benefit and to that of my children. Would I have been happier doing something where I did not have to convince myself that my work was important? If I felt like I was making more of a difference with my work and truly loving it, would I be a better mother and role-model? Or would the continuous strain on my family and relationship with my husband have outweighed this benefit?
For those who have lived through this decision, what are your thoughts? If you had it to do over again, would you? Have any of you switched specialties after your initial match? How have your spouses and children dealt with the continuous demands of your career in medicine?
Monday, April 12, 2010
MiM Mailbag: Anesthesia vs Cardiology (vs OB/GYN?)
Dear MiM,
My name is Taj. Let me just start off by saying I am 100% sure that I am going into the medical field. There's no backing down on my part. I am a highschool junior getting ready to start applying to schools next year and my first choice is the Sophie Davis School of Biomedical Education, a 7yr BS/MD program (not sure if you ladies heard of it). Also any advice you can give on surviving pre-med and medical school I will gladly take :)
I am really interested in anesthesiology and cardiology so my question is really for MommyDoctor and JC. I wanted to know how and when did you ladies juggle and decide when to have kids and also what do you both love about your careers?
MommyDoctor do you work oncall? How did you know you wanted to go into anesthesia and why? What do you love about your job? If you weren't an anesthesiologist what other specialty may you have chosen?
JC what type of cardiologist are you...ex: an interventional cardiologist, cardiac surgeon or just general area cardiology? How did you know you wanted to go into cardiology and why cardiology? Do you think you would have ever gone into cardiac surgery? If so do you think you would still have time to have children? If you weren't a cardiologist what other specialty might you have chosen?
I also have a question for Dr. Whoo.
I actually like babies and the whole aspect of pregnancy and delivery that's how I know no matter what specialty in medicine I choose I want to have kids. But Dr. Whoo how did you come to terms with going into ob/gyn. I think I am interested in it but I am just scared of the malpractice suits.... :( I think that would scare me from going into that specialty.
Thanks in Advance,
Taj
My name is Taj. Let me just start off by saying I am 100% sure that I am going into the medical field. There's no backing down on my part. I am a highschool junior getting ready to start applying to schools next year and my first choice is the Sophie Davis School of Biomedical Education, a 7yr BS/MD program (not sure if you ladies heard of it). Also any advice you can give on surviving pre-med and medical school I will gladly take :)
I am really interested in anesthesiology and cardiology so my question is really for MommyDoctor and JC. I wanted to know how and when did you ladies juggle and decide when to have kids and also what do you both love about your careers?
MommyDoctor do you work oncall? How did you know you wanted to go into anesthesia and why? What do you love about your job? If you weren't an anesthesiologist what other specialty may you have chosen?
JC what type of cardiologist are you...ex: an interventional cardiologist, cardiac surgeon or just general area cardiology? How did you know you wanted to go into cardiology and why cardiology? Do you think you would have ever gone into cardiac surgery? If so do you think you would still have time to have children? If you weren't a cardiologist what other specialty might you have chosen?
I also have a question for Dr. Whoo.
I actually like babies and the whole aspect of pregnancy and delivery that's how I know no matter what specialty in medicine I choose I want to have kids. But Dr. Whoo how did you come to terms with going into ob/gyn. I think I am interested in it but I am just scared of the malpractice suits.... :( I think that would scare me from going into that specialty.
Thanks in Advance,
Taj
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